The Big Win

 Dear Koko, 

Someone told me, it is the little things in life that make life worth living. As I grow older, I think there is something inside me that has given up loving things which are traditionally considered "big wins". Sure there was a time when I would have considered a big TV, or a fancy phone to be the epitome of luxury. I think that person in me is gone. I am not sure whether it is because I grew up or I naturally gravitated towards your almost Zen behavior. 

I am so surprised at the lack of want that you exhibit in the face of certain rewards. I am talking about times when we are at the mall for example, we ask if you want this or that. You don't exhibit the greedy want or crazy excitement that I remember feeling as a child. Not all the time of course, but sometimes :)

So let's go to this December morning when I saw you absolutely thrilled by an idea and we sort of got swept up in the spontaneity of the moment ourselves.

It was a Thursday morning, you were on vacation and the day started as usual. We got up early and were just sitting on the couch. I made tea for your father and you were just waking up. It was the most random plan that ever happened. We just stuffed some of our clothes, frankly, the first things we could literally get our hands on. We packed up Snowy, put him in the dog boarding. We were criminally under prepared - booking an Air BnB as we drove out, picking up sandwiches on the way. 

In less than an hour of us sitting on the couch, we were on the road. And boy did we have fun! It is so amazing to see you grow up to be this little person with independent ideas of "fun" constitutes. You no longer need us to tell you or plan things for you! Once we were on the road you were totally in on the "choosing the playlist", "spotting the burger on the roadside" game. 

Once we reached Pondicherry, you were an adventurer. Googling reviews of the best bakeries in town, or getting to the perfect beaches, you were always on point with those!

I don't know about you, but I loved it, walking to the Promenade with you every morning, or you discovering what French toast really is, to buying cheap sunglasses for the beach - every moment was precious. It's great to see you grow into the curious and very interesting boy!

One day really stands out in my memory. We were at the beach, it was morning and we were taking a walk. Suddenly, a vendor came with a bunch of raw mangoes cut in perfect moon slices. Raw mangoes with a sprinkle of red chilli powder and rock salt, just a slice of childhood and summer vacations. We sat on the sand and had it. You ran after the vendor to get some more. It was like time froze for a moment and we were just there. I wish I could crystallize it in my mind eye forever. This, this moment of not caring is pure luxury. This is the big win

Love,

Ma

 



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